the Unspoken Laws of SHARED LIVING
A Parchment on Harmonious Coexistence
Ah, the magical realm of the share house. It's a place where hilarity and catastrophe dance a tango, and if you're not careful, chaos reigns supreme. So, dear reader, let's delve into the treasure trove of unspoken rules that govern the land of shared living. These golden nuggets might not be etched into your tenancy agreement, but trust me, they hold the key to blissful cohabitation. So, without further ado...
The Forbidden Fruit: Thy Flatmate's Food
Picture this: a kitchen filled with tantalizing treats, shared amongst comrades in domesticity. But hold your horses, my friend! Just because you're basking in the glory of shared living spaces does not grant you a free-for-all access to every edible item in sight. No, no, no! Unless you've explicitly established an alternative arrangement, each person's food is their sacred realm, untouchable and off-limits.
Here's a rule of thumb: never open or finish anything that isn't yours. It's too conspicuous, too challenging to mask, and of course, you'll be obliged to replace what you've devoured. This principle extends to leftovers as well. That delectable slice of lasagna tucked away in a cozy box? Hands off, my friend! Unless your flatmate has granted you the green light, refrain from indulging. And for heaven's sake, inquire about your flatmate's plans for those eggs before embarking on an omelet extravaganza.
To simplify matters, designate a shelf in the fridge and the pantry for each flatmate. Leave a communal shelf for all to partake in the bounty. If you're feeling generous, bored with your culinary creations, or simply wish to combat food waste, you may contribute to the communal stash. But remember, with great sharing comes great responsibility.
Spices and Condiments: The House's Holy Grail
Now, when it comes to pantry staples like spices and condiments, the rules shift. These flavor enhancers typically fall under the jurisdiction of the house, rather than an individual flatmate. Salt, pepper, sugar, butter, tomato sauce, and other everyday essentials tend to be communal property.
However, let it be known that if you deplete a precious item, it becomes your duty to replenish it. At the very least, inform your flatmates so that the next brave soul venturing to the supermarket can restore equilibrium to the culinary kingdom.
Bin Management: The Balancing Act
Ah, the bin—the receptacle of our collective refuse. But beware! It has its own unspoken commandment. When the bin reaches its peak capacity, demanding a precarious balancing act to accommodate further waste, know that it is your turn, my friend, to take out the trash.
Do the honorable thing: tie up that bulging bag and hope that your housemates will reciprocate in due time. Or better yet, establish a chore roster that includes bin duty—simplicity at its finest.
Shower Showdown: The Early Bird's Privilege
In the realm of shared homes, especially those graced with three or more flatmates and a lone bathroom, the morning shower schedule can resemble a delicate juggling act. One way to navigate this delicate dance is by establishing a set shower timetable for those who simultaneously prepare for their daily grind.
However, hear me out—I care not for your intricate morning rituals. If you rise as the sun illuminates the world, be a benevolent soul and claim the shower first. By doing so, you ensure that your flatmates will have their turn when they arise. It's a small sacrifice for the greater good, my friend.
Mess Prevention: Thy Neatness is Thy Virtue
Ah, cleanliness—a virtue revered in the realm of shared living. While each person's definition of "clean" may vary, it's wise to take cues from your flatmates. Avoid being the messy one who grates on everyone's nerves. Shared spaces should be habitable for all, so it's essential to be considerate and tidy up before departing. This includes taking your books, papers, and games with you when leaving the common areas, as well as washing your dishes and wiping down the countertops after cooking. Yes, my friend, thou shalt wipe the countertops and stovetop as well.
And let us not forget the sacred haven of shared bathrooms, where cleanliness can deteriorate with alarming speed. If you desire harmony, spare a moment for a quick inspection after your shower or grooming routine. Keep a cloth handy to wipe the mirror and countertops, hang up the bath mat, remove your hair from the drain, and, of course, utilize the power of the toilet brush. No flatmate should bear witness to your "skid marks."
Toilet Paper Etiquette: The Roll Continues
Ah, the realm of bathroom rules! Here's a crucial decree: if you deplete the last of the toilet paper, thou must replace the roll—swiftly and decisively.
No waiting, no procrastination. Do it promptly after washing your hands. For if you delay, the forgetfulness shall consume you, and we've all been victims of the paper-free plight, haven't we? Spare your flatmates (and potentially yourself) the embarrassment of a paperless pee...or worse. And if the replacement roll happens to be the final one in the pack, take the initiative to procure more or kindly inquire if your flatmate is en route to the shops.
Keep It Contained: The Symphony of Silence
Ah, love, that splendid force that defies time and space. But let me offer a word of wisdom: 3 a.m. trysts on the kitchen counter of your share house are not to be celebrated. Noisy amorous adventures that spill into shared spaces are strictly forbidden (or at least frowned upon when your flatmates are present).
It's far wiser to enjoy intimate moments with your accomplice in the privacy of your own room rather than becoming an unwitting spectacle for your poor flatmate seeking a midnight glass of water. Furthermore, it's best to keep your bedroom escapades at a respectable volume to avoid awkward morning-after conversations about "noise levels" with the flatmate next door. Remember, if you don't wish to hear their proverbial peaks, rest assured they don't desire a serenade from you either.
These, my dear comrades, are the unspoken rules of share houses. However, every abode carries its unique quirks and regulations. In matters of shared living, it's far better to engage in open dialogue rather than harbor these sentiments in solitude. So, gather your fellow inhabitants, discuss, and forge a harmonious existence within the realm you call home.